Getting Your Kids to Eat Healthy Foods
First, check out my newer post: How to get kids to love real food with our son who shares his advice. 🙂
And don't miss the fun update at the end of this post!
Martha asks:
I was wondering how old your kids were when you started to change the way you cooked/ate, and how they felt about the change? Some changes have been easy for us, but others leave my oldest one or two complaining.
My response:
Our oldest is 16 and when we started eating healthier meals 5 years ago it didn't phase the others (our youngest wasn't born yet), and they hardly fuss about anything, but he has been tough.
Who can blame him though?
I fed him such junk for the first 11 years of his life, that's all he knew – Poptarts and boxed sugar-bomb cereals for breakfast was the norm. Eating out a few times a week was typical, too. The other day he was at a relative's house and had Hot Pockets. He told me, “I remember when I used to think, ‘Oh, Hot Pockets again… whatever', now I'm like, ‘Ahhhhhh! Hot Pockets! YESSSS!'” Thankfully he has a good sense of humor and we were both cracking up when he said this. He was young enough the first few years that there were only minimal issues, but the last year or so he's increased the complaining significantly. If I have one boxed food or one ounce of junk food around (and I often do, for a recipe or whatever reason), he sniffs it out and will pig out on just that until it's gone.
I try not to freak out about this stuff too much, because I know it is SO NORMAL for teens to act this way.
I remember having all sorts of boxed junk around growing up (although Mom cooked a lot of good stuff from scratch, too), and I STILL complained all the time that there was “nothing to eat around here.” When Kent & I first started dating, I'd spout off that same old complaint and he'd look in our fridge and say, “Are you KIDDING me?!” He grew up in a home where they ate mostly from their garden (he knows now how blessed he was), and they didn't have as many of the “modern convenience foods” as we did, so our fridge and pantry looked like a goldmine to him!
Since the beginning I've made it a point not to be a Nazi about everything, knowing it would just make the junk all the more attractive.
He still has a soda pop if we go out to eat (not often). I still make baked goodies more than I should. We have take-out pizza night now and then. We're still much more “mainstream” than we should be (we usually go by the 80/20 plan), and partly this is all in hopes that when he goes off to college, he won't go crazy and fill up with nothing but the junk he felt deprived of for years.
Even though we've tried to be low-key about it, I still think he'll go a little crazy at college.
He just said again the other day, “When I'm in the dorm, it's Cocoa Puffs and Lucky Charms every morning!” I zipped my lip and said a prayer that if he might “fall away” from eating healthier foods after he moves out (or fall away from his faith like some kids do), that he won't be gone long, and that he'll return with stronger convictions to follow the Truths he learned when he was still living with us.
What more can we do as parents?
My biggest suggestion is to keep as little junk food around as absolutely possible. After a while they won't complain anymore if it's never there and they know it's not coming back. Then fill them up with the good stuff and make it taste great with lots of healthy fats!
Obviously, it's much easier the younger they are. If only I'd known before he was born what I know now! But I can only move forward from here doing the best I can.
A fun update!
Now it's 15 years later and I'm happy to report that this same kid is an awesome man who LOVES my food, he's begun to love cooking himself, and he never eats sugar bomb cereals or drinks soda pops–he even takes cod liver oil! Our second oldest son loves my food too and never eats junk either! The next two still have a ways to go, so I'll keep praying. 🙂
I'd love to hear how you deal with your complaining kids!
Kelly says
Thanks for all your great tips, you’ve obviously learned a lot from mothering 5 kids! 🙂
Christine says
We have 5 kids (6-18 yrs) and have actually, lightened up a bit as far as what we have/eat/serve at home. : ) (We’ve never been a family to eat Hot Pockets or such, but I usually keep a package of pretzels or cookies on hand to toss out to a gang of teens skateboarding in my driveway on occasion, these days).
My obligation, in my view, is to serve regular healthy meals and have actual *food* available for snacks: fruit, raw cheeses, kefir, yogurt, popped corn in CO and seasalt, and homemade bread with (purchased!) peanutbutter on hand for those teen munchies. Almost any baked goods (bread, cake, cookies, muffins) are homemade and with healthy oils and flour, and no preservatives or icky stuff. In a pinch, I pick up organic.
I recall my first born, at age 3, got to a stage where she would -only- eat peanut butter on whole wheat, and yogurt. I could hardly get her to try any other foods. I asked about this at a doctor visit, and the nurse looked at me wisely, smilingly, and simply said, ‘Why not run out of those three things?’
May I tell you, that worked like a CHARM??! : D
It took a couple days…but that tray of cut up veggies and dip looked pretty tempting to a hungry 3 year old.
We don’t do table battles, either. If you decide you don’t like what is served….you have decided to sit and chat pleasantly, and not snack until the next meal. After school snack, btw, is a 4th meal around here. I try to make it ‘half’ of dinner, actually. Veggies and dip, antipasto tray, cheese & crackers, pbj. If I set something out – they do not ‘rummage’ around and end up with cereal and milk.
Recently, our family did a long, cold, couple mile trail hike on a Sunday afternoon. By the time we returned home, everyone was *famished.* I had a crock pot of homemade vegetable beef soup, and a freshly baked loaf of whole wheat bread and some butter waiting for us. A simple, healthy meal – that often noses turned up to. But being starved, everyone just raved about how good it was. Hunger is a delightful seasoning! Dh and I used to have a saying, ‘Food is sooooo good, when you are hungry!’
I do not sweat about what my teens will grab and eat at school or youth group. By the time they are old enough to spend a couple hours away from ‘us’, I also trust them to make their own decisions about food. : ) And that may include a Pepsi for my ds16! I am far more concerned about our relationship as parent to young *adult*, frankly, than I am about what he chooses to eat. : ) My girls, however, will not drink soda. The younger 2 know it just plain isn’t allowed, and fruit juice is actually a treat to them. (At home, juice with soda water is a nice pop substitute.)
Bodies get used to what they are fed regularily. : )
Good fats and protein control the carb cravings – I make sure to serve these at most meals. : ) I remember my teen brother coming home from school and eating slice after slice from a loaf of bread, trying to keep up with his growing 6’4″ body! (Poor kid needed some good fats & protein!!)
Kelly says
Jeanne, that’s so true, I need to remember to remind my kids about how “taste buds grow up” – I know even with myself, there are still things that I am learning to like all the time. Coconut and onions are my recent new “likes”. 🙂
jeanne says
When our children were little, our rule was that you had to take as many bites of something, as you are old. I would only put a very small amount (maybe 1-2 tablespoons of the food) on their plate. Then they would take the bites. I never worried about them finishing what was on the plate (I let them have the power to leave some so that they felt in control). By the time our kids were five or six they realized that it was easier just to eat it then complain. Now that they are all preteen/ teenagers we still insist that they eat atleast a tablespoon of what ever has been prepared. We use the philosphy that tastebuds change and they might find that they like something. In the last year one child (14) who hated sauerkraut now loves it and ask for it. Another (17) has discover he really likes sauted asparagus.
Kelly says
Vera, did you see this post? https://kellythekitchenkop.com/2008/12/organic-homemade-hot-cocoa-recipe.html – it’s really good!
Your comments make sense (about the crazy food habits and addictions we may be setting them up for not letting them have a ton of crap), but yet I still think I have to err on the side of caution and limit the junk every chance we get…it’s such a tough line to walk!
Martha, yes, definite progress, just do what you can!
Thanks for all the great comments, everyone!
Vera says
I have a major problem giving up my Swiss Miss hot chocolate packets, but I’m experimenting with other options for my chocolate fix.
I took a regents exam for english this january; we had to lisetn to an article and write an essay based on it’s ideas. The article was about how parents, in trying to get their kids to eat their veggies, set the stage for negative attitudes towards healthy food. For instance: “Eat your peas and you can have dessert”. That automatically gives the connotation that peas don’t taste good, and while it works in the short term, in the long run, the kid still will not want to eat their peas. Also, by associating special occasions with certain foods, like cake to birthdays, it automatically makes kids more apt to like/want cake because they love birthdays and birthday parties.
Martha says
Thanks for answering this question, Kelly. Unlike you, I HAVE been a food Nazi about this all too often, and it has been detrimental. I am really working on trying to change that. My 13yo told me a few weeks ago that he would rather have juice than pop so we talked that over, and now we have a small glass of oj with breakfast every morning. He, in turn, has promised to limit his pop/hot chocolate (non healthy kind) to only three times a week max. I make sure the juice is drunk along with a meal and count it as progress. 🙂
nonegiven says
I remember my mother feeding me oatmeal for breakfast because it would ‘stick to my ribs’ when I knew only eggs would keep me from getting hungry before lunch. I was 7, I thought i must be misunderstanding the meaning of ‘stick to your ribs.’
Shauna says
I have always tried to drill into my children’s little minds and thought processes that the family doesn’t revolve around them. What that looks like with food is this, “Sometimes what we’re having is your favorite, sometimes it’s mom’s favorite, sometimes it’s your sister’s favorite, etc. It’s not about whether or not it’s your favorite – it’s about how hard your dad works to provide for this family, and how hard mom works to prepare your food. Above all, we’re just grateful to God for His abundant provision.” I think that the long season of unemployment/underemployment that we’ve dealt with has helped to shape a heart of gratitude.
Generally, my kids are very thankful to have regular home-cooked meals. Where I get the resistance, is usually at breakfast. They do get tired of eggs, and I’m not always going to make pancakes…… so it’s mostly eggs for breakfast, or toast and a string cheese!
Here’s a funny though…..
My 5yo daughter said to me out of the blue one day:
“Mom – when are we going to go to a hotel again?”
“I don’t know sweetie – I suppose when we need to take a trip again.”
“Hotel’s are fun mom…… (long pause, and you have to imagine the starry-eyed far-away look in her eyes as she said…..) besides – they have CEREAL at hotels!”
HA HA HA HA HA ….. oh I wish I had a rolling-on-the-floor smiley to insert here……. she was practically DROOLING over the memory!
Shauna
Shauna
Kristin says
I was fortunate to find WAP and generally eat healthier (even before WAP) so the kids have grown up on it. I still get complaints from a couple of picky eaters but it isn’t usually about junk/convenience foods vs. real food. It is more of a “Ugh, onions!” sort of thing.
Of course we practice much food “brainwashing” and talk about how bad GMO foods, sodas, sugar, fast foods, etc. are. So they understand why we are eating the way we are.
It also helps that they participate in the growing and gathering of our foods. They may think “Ugh, onions!” when I serve something but that same kid will eat green onion tops right out of the garden.
Henriette says
My daughter is almost 15 years- and when I started to change my diet she was just 5 years old.
I started to feed her according to Bloodtypediet- off curse she sometimed wondered why I wouldn