I've been through two major life changes or “conversions”:
A “food conversion” and a Christian conversion. Don't leave yet! I won't go all weird on you, but even if you haven't been through either of those types of life changes, chances are you've had other times in your life when you've noticed a big difference in yourself with new convictions as far as how you wanted to live from that point on. No matter what type of life changes you went through, I'll bet you've noticed some of the same challenges that I have, and if so you're not alone…
Here are 5 ways all life changes are the same:
- After going through both conversions, I wanted to tell EVERYONE about it! These newfound truths were so exciting, I thought the world should know. There's no doubt that in both cases I irritated people like crazy, and probably still do now and then. It took some time and growing to realize that everyone isn't ready or willing to hear what I wanted to share, just because I wanted to share it. Sometimes, just like ‘the old me', they aren't “there” yet and may not care to ever be there, either. (It wasn't that long ago that I didn't care about things like trans fats and high fructose corn syrup on ingredient labels either.) Now I try to be a better listener instead because everyone has something to teach us, no matter where they are on the journey.
- Whenever you make big life changes, you'll be attacked for it. Sometimes in big ways, but at the very least you'll probably be accused of going “overboard” like I was. Although I never could figure out how in my particular types of conversions someone can go overboard. When it comes to Christianity, how can you try too much to be more like God, who is only good? When it comes to making attempts at eating healthier, can you do that too much? Especially in America where our food supply is pathetic?! Still, people often feel they have to defend themselves, maybe because they aren't ready to make the same changes yet. I've been accused of “depriving” my poor kids of sweets or junk food. When this happens, I've learned to have thick skin and not let it bother me, because usually they're only joking around, or sometimes they just don't understand. I know that this is better for our family, not just in the present, but far into the future, and that's all that matters. The point is, anytime you make life changes or are different from others, you'll likely be persecuted for it (and sometimes it feels like high school).
- In both cases, I learned that nothing you say can urge others to make positive changes in their own lives until they're truly ready (or when it comes to Christianity, until the Holy Spirit moves in them…) This is a tough one, because like anyone else I love my family and friends and just want their bodies and souls to be healthy! I have to remind myself (often!) that nobody likes a know-it-all or a bulldozer, so I pray I'll know when the timing is right and when to speak up. Until then it's really not my business what choices others make. I'm slowly learning to respect that and keep my mouth shut more.
- The time frame for life changes is different for everyone. No matter what sort of conversion, for some people it takes place over a very long period of time, as in years, and for others it's fast. No matter how it happens is “okay”, as long as you're growing over time and becoming more of the person you want to be, or even more important, the person God wants you to be.
- Lastly, both times I learned that God really can do the impossible in us! Even though I grew up going to church now and then, there was a lot I didn't understand about Christianity, and in my mind Jesus freaks were just plain nuts. To get past those barriers and many others, and decide to open up to Him in my own Christian conversion, was miraculous. (If you are like I was and just “don't get it”, check out other blog for help.) As far as my food conversion, this is how I know He did the impossible: when I can go to the grocery store and bypass my beloved Cocoa Puffs or Pop Tarts because of all the junk on their ingredient labels, you KNOW something miraculous has happened!
Tell me about YOUR big life changes?
More you might like:
Jonathan says
I support you in finding what is meaningful to you. Just remember, though, that some of us who grew up in godly families and were devout believers eventually had “reverse conversions” and came to see all religions as myth and gods created by man in man’s own image, not the other way around.
This is not to diminish your journey, it’s just a reminder that while surely everyone can agree that healthier foods is the ultimate good answer in that area (science proves it), not everyone will agree that choosing to believe in supernatural beings is the ultimate good answer in that area (since it’s based on “faith,” not evidence).
I went from infancy to around age 40 never once missing church except for illness, and went to private religious schools from first grade into grad school, with a degree in religion. I preached many a sermon. No one could possibly have been more devout.
But there were too many questions, too many pieces of the puzzle that didn’t fit. When I eventually embraced the uncomfortable truth (for me) that all religion was myth, it was very painful, but I had made a commitment always to adjust my beliefs to truth and reality (as best I could determine it) rather than try to bend truth and reality to fit my cherished beliefs.
The surprising result was that once I got over the pain of making such a drastic change, it turned out to be the most wonderful thing ever to happen in my life—because now I was living what for me was a life of authenticity. I was so excited about this that, like you, I wanted to tell everyone! But just as you discovered, people aren’t always open to hearing about the life-changing new conclusions we’ve reached, especially when it’s a case of dumping religion.
Anyway, good for you. You should keep on with what makes you happy and fulfilled. Just remember that many come to a greater sense of fulfillment, purpose and meaning by seeing religion as baggage and cutting it loose.
KitchenKop says
Thanks for writing Jonathan, I appreciate you sharing thoughts from another viewpoint.
Could I ask you a question though? You say there’s no “evidence of faith”. Do you believe in love? Faith is like love in that it can’t be seen or touched the way we can see or touch an object, but I still believe in it.
Also, could I ask one more thing? (And I’m asking these things in friendship with total sincerity and respect…)
Would you be willing to tell me, did something bad/sad happen before you turned away from God?
Kelly
Beth says
Jonathan, been there felt that. Faith and religion the way it is practiced and taught today induces a great deal of skepticism. You might want to check out Love Without End Jesus Speaks by Glenda Green. To me it is a modern day new testament that reconciles all the conflicting aspects of religion. Ex. why does God allow suffering? Most prayers are the equivalent of please rescue my sand castle. (Please heal my cancer while I eat a buffet of Roundup and GMOs, ex.) A key takeaway from this book is discerning reality/truth/God (God’s food is love created to nourish) from structure/man-made constructs/mind-generated realities (man’s genetically altered food cancels that love and is designed to kill…insects and more). Highly recommend it as the only self-help book anyone really needs.
Lori Smith says
Jonathan,
Could it be you were in religion and not truly seeking God? Religion is when we are into all the rites and doing what a particular religion asks us to do instead of reading our bibles daily to learn more about God and so He can reveal Himself to us in a more meaningful way.
I am not ‘religious” I am in a personal relationship with God. Religion will fail you every time, but God will not.
I wish we lived closer as I would love to know the inconsistencies you found that made you lose your faith as I have never once come across any inconsistencies and I read through my bible once every 12-16 months (I am not in a hurry- I like to ponder and spend more time in some sections). I always enjoy talking with others and exchanging ideas in this area, whether a believer or not as it is always interesting.
God says if you seek Him you will find Him. I have had too many up close and personal interactions with God to ever say I do not believe. The Holy Spirit has spoken to me many times in very real ways and shown Himself to me in a way that cannot be denied.
I am so sorry you have lost your faith, though you find it freeing.
Please feel free to contact me if you’d ever like to have a civil and deep (real) conversation (not argument) on this issue. I am not a Theologian, but I am a devout believer in Almighty God and His Son, Jesus.
I enjoyed reading your story.
Wendy Nuxoll says
I would just encourage you, Jonathan, to keep seeking answers. I will pray for you for this! I invite you to check out catholic.com, as there are so many questions and answers there! Maybe you will not agree with everything there, but it is a great place to ask questions, ponder, and seek answers! There is evidence! Keep looking! God bless you!!!
Cynthia Busse says
Applause for being so transparent and honest. Those two would be my biggest conversions in life as well. Throw in becoming a mom as well.
TGB says
WOW ! Kelly you are right on !! I was so glad to see this post today, and it couldn’t be more timely- especially 2. I find that whenever I make changes to my life or refuse to conform, people get REALLY angry about it- I think it’s because people get used to “the way you are”, and if that changes, it puts THEM out of their comfort zone since they no longer know what to expect. I also notice, when you elevate your knowledge, you tend to meet more like minded people & your circles may change.
rachel says
Hi Kelly, this is a sweet and thoughtful post, thank you for sharing. It’s a great insight, to see how you responded to both these important events in your life. I’ve done it too, over different things and realised it’s not so skillful. And it’s so helpful to be reminded, because I see I’ve been slipping into it again with the WAP food thing. Thank you (and thanks for the recipe ideas).
Best, rachel
KitchenKop says
This post is from a while back so it’s good to know people are still finding their way to it! 🙂
Kel
Lisa says
Kelly, this is precisely where I am right now. Funny how learning the truth (in both instances) makes you want to shout to the world about it! A healthy dose of grace, mercy and humility… knowing we were in there very shoes goes a long way 🙂
Sarah says
Kelly,
Just snooping around and wanted to say how much I appreciate this perspective. Having grown up in a great Christian family, I don’t really have/remember a conversion time – but I’m DEFINITELY experiencing one with food…especially in relation to my husband and my parents (and my MIL who is a PHD in “nutrition”). Thanks for helping me get a wider perspective on all this!
Kelly says
Janet, I don’t know if you saw it, but that book (by Susan Jeffers) is on my favorite books list, I LOVE IT, too!
Janet W says
My 2 conversions have been food and Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway (Jeffers — and fear is based on food because of serotonin and other neurotransmitter production.)
My friends think I am on some crazy diet. I tried for a while to tell them a little about food, but you’re 100% correct about people not being there. But some days it drives me *WILD* to see how they hurt themselves. They all have varying illnesses, some severe, and they all eat tons of junk and think it’s ok. One friend gets put out because I won’t go out at lunch and buy fast food anymore. But they are only following the current medical advice, and most people in the US believe that an MD’s word is authoritative. I lived in Germany for 9 years, my father had an organic garden while I was in high school and college, so I feel fortunate that I have seen something other than the “norm.”
Lisa says
Wow, I never looked at it from this point of view before, but you are so very right.
Kelly says
Aww shucks, Meggie, thanks. (I’ll get you the $10 soon for the comment.)
Love, Kel
mmccall says
Well done. I know many will relate. That is why I love you Kel – your real, honest and you admit you are not perfect. If only we could all be like that. Great read today. I very much enjoyed it and have things to think about!!!