Can't we all use more effective time management skills?
Most of us have the same daily frustration: there aren't enough hours in the day.
As Real Foodies, we have even more to fit into our waking hours. Yes, there are plenty of healthy fast meals we can whip up, and we all get more efficient as we learn tricks so that everything flows better, but still, at times the Real Foodie, “slow food” lifestyle does eat up a larger chunk of our day. (And blogging about it, even more so!)
So how do you do it?
We're part-way through January, so now might be a good time to take another look at your 2012 goals.
What are your best tips for planning out your days, sticking to the plan, being flexible when things come up, and most importantly, how to enjoy life in the midst of it all?
My tips…
There are a few things I've learned, and I hope you'll share your tips in the comments, too, because I have a long way to go and still feel frazzled most of the time.
- Start with making a list of your goals. If you were fitting everything into your week that you wanted to, what would be on that list? Include “fun” things and to-do items. Pencil all of it into a weekly plan. (I did this last fall, and it looked good on paper, but turns out there still weren't enough hours because everything takes so much longer than it should!)
- Be realistic. If you can't fit it all in, start crossing things off, learn to say NO. I've gotten good at this because I keep reminding myself that when the kids are grown, then I can volunteer to help more with this or that, but right now my family and my business get the majority of my time. We really can't do it all, and don't you hate that?
- One thing that has worked really well around here is to plan certain to-do items for when the kids are home from school that we can do together, or that I can do while helping them with homework at the same time: things like folding, cooking dinner, going through never ending piles of mail and papers, emptying the dishwasher, etc.
Build some margin into your life. Don't cut everything so close. Here's one way I do this and it saves me a load of stress… If I have to be out the door by 8:50, then I'll play little games with myself and say that I have to be out by 8:45. (Kent thinks playing games to not be late is dumb, but he's Mr. Marine Corp Disciplined Guy, and I know me, it's what I have to do to get places on time!) Here's a book with more about this: Margin: Restoring Emotional, Physical, Financial, and Time Reserves to Overloaded Lives. I should really pull that out and read it again.- Be OK with imperfections. That one is almost a cliche, but we all need the reminder. My house is almost always picked up, just because clutter bugs both Kent and me, but don't look too close at the bathrooms, my oven, the windows, or in the corners, because it's not pretty. And I've decided that wrinkly clothes are just the way it's going to be. I can get loads through the washer and dryer fairly easily, but just can't seem to get the folding done on a daily basis. (We work out of the clean laundry baskets for most of each week.) As I said above, as much as I want to get to it all, most days I just can't. (Yes, the kids help with a lot of this stuff, but on busy evenings it's not easy finding time to get them to do it, either.)
- Have a heart to heart with your spouse if needed. Thankfully Kent is a great help around here and understands that I can't get to everything, so he's always helping with homework, or doing dishes, even toilets! Yes, I know this makes me super blessed. He rarely even complains about it, for real! If you need help, have you tried just asking? For some it still just won't happen, and if so, focus on the other qualities that make your spouse wonderful, no one is perfect, and in that case, see the next one…
- If you or your spouse hate cleaning and the budget allows, hire help! If I ever make enough money to justify it, I'd LOVE to hire someone to help clean, even a once-a-month cleaner would be so nice. Someday… For now, we'll continue with our “family cleaning parties” on Saturdays when needed, the kids love those.
- Above all, I tell myself often to “choose the better part“. Helping in our kids' classrooms or at church as I can is important to me. Being flexible with my schedule if a friend needs something is a priority, too. I constantly have to remind myself that the to-do list will always be looming, and yes, earning money to pay for college and such is necessary, but sometimes other things need to take precedence.
Having said all that, I still get really frustrated at not being able to stay on top of things better.
I know that having my own business, which takes up way too many hours, doesn't help, but PLEASE tell me how do you get it all done in a day and still be a good parent/spouse/friend, pray, eat well, sleep well, exercise, etc. etc. etc.?????? Thank you!
Related links:
- Need some help with your Real Foodie lifestyle? Check out my Real Food for Rookies book.
- Healthy options for fast food meals
- Need help decluttering?
Commenter via Facebook says
Great tips kelly! I recently started more detailed ‘to do’ list where I have 3 categories. Items listed in category #1 are most important to get done, number 2 is middle and number 3 is least important or more long-term goals. That way when I look at my to-do list it’s not just a huge overwhelming list and I can just focus on getting category #1 stuff done before I move on to other things. So far it’s going well!
Grandma Len says
I’m an empty-nester and hubby still works full-time so I now have time to learn and do many of the things I didn’t have time to do when the kids were still at home and when I worked outside the home full time. But I still have time-management problems – if I’m not careful I’ll spend too much time on the computer so I’ve decided to cut myself off at 7AM – we get up at 5AM and hubby is “breakfasted” and out of the house, lunch in hand, a little after 6AM – so the next few minutes are mine to do crossword puzzles, catch up on email and facebook, or just sit on the porch and enjoy a cup of coffee. I decided that for Lent I would spend part of each early morning “me time” planning my day and for the last few days it has made things seem easier but I’m not good yet at remembering EVERYTHING that needs to be done that day so I’ve started making notes to myself (on paper) about to-do’s. Maybe flylady would be helpful – I’ll check into that tomorrow morning, during my “me time” 🙂 Loved hearing all these ideas – thanks, Kelly
KitchenKop says
I love how it is obvious that you are embracing this time in your life. My prayer is that I don’t miss ONE day, that I embrace every stage well. And that we are healthy to be able to do that and help others along the way. 🙂
Kelly
Jen says
Since we went paleo, food just feels so much simpler.
1. We don’t have to worry about soaking, fermenting it baking any grains.
2. We don’t have to plan a trip to cthe dairy farmer.
3. We hit the grocery store once a week for veggies and skip most of the other aisles.
4. We don’t worry about keeping snacks on hands because our meals are satisfying enough that we don’t get hungry between meals.
5. Meals are meat plus one or two veggies and that’s it!
6. We do a weekly cook up where we spend one hour cooking up burgers, ground meat, chicken thighs, etc plus chop veggies and pre-cook root vegetables. It gives us a big head start to the week.
Going paleo also helped us see life from a whole different perspective. We just started simplifying everything from cleaning to gardening to clothes, how we spend our time, what we ALLOW to stress us out. Heck, I even downsized my purse. It felt effortless.
Kathy (aka Mrs Dull) says
The single biggest timesaver I’ve come up with over the years is buying in quantity and cooking from a pantry. It greatly reduces the amount of time spent in stores. I was just reading somewhere today that household shopping was judged the most time-consuming chore according to a survey. I believe it. I’ve always bought many things online, but have bumped it up a bit lately to see how close I can get to never stepping into supermarket 🙂
Jeanmarie says
I *don’t* get it all done, that’s for sure!
KitchenKop says
Hey everyone who mentioned adrenal fatigue, it sounds like a post on this would be good…
Would you all be willing to send me an email ([email protected]) with ADRENAL FATIGUE in the subject line and let me know what you’ve learned as you go down this path that could help others who are dealing with the same issue??
I could compile your answers for a post. I’d really appreciate it and bet it could help so many. Thank you!!!
Kelly
Jeanne says
After going back to work last year, I found it difficult to manage my time at home. Something that I have been doing since the fall that has given us back lots of time is to become unplugged during designated times. Electronics are turn off and put away at 9pm during the week and I am completely off emails, facebook on the weekends. It takes discipline but has allowed me to be focused at home and with my family. Hard, but well worth it!
Christena says
I learned that PLAN is not a 4-letter word LOL. I also embrace your idea of “choosing the better part” – sometimes simply because its what I want to do!! I started cooking everything for the week in 3 hours on Sunday-simply to never have to answer the question of “whats for dinner?”
I blog about it- check our my menus and recipes to help you streamline.
Kelsey says
I was going to mention Flylady as well – she’s a great free resource to help you streamline cleaning.
This has reminded me that I really need to make a weekly plan. I work full time, run an online business part-time, and am heavily involved in my church. On top of that, I have adrenal issues as well, so adding traditional cooking can be a bit overwhelming, but I think it’s worth it, and I find it very rewarding. Batch cooking is a huge help, and one of my goals this year is to do that regularly. Our challenge is our very tiny freezer space, with absolutely no room in our 850 sq foot house for a chest freezer (plus, we’re now getting ready to move to another state, so buying a chest freezer is completely out). We did a lot more freezing of meals when we had more freezer space. Now it’s a challenge to even squeeze in some frozen beans!
Being a perfectionist can make it even harder to get things done, but I try to remember “done is better than perfect.” And I just try to remember that this is one season of my life, and so there are certain things that I can and cannot do at this point, and that helps me keep a little perspective. I like Stanley’s comments on finding pleasure in mundane things. I think if we could find that child-like spirit we used to have when we loved “helping” mom in the kitchen (and I used to love helping her pay bills because I’m a nerd), and when we felt so grown-up when we were able to help with the laundry… it would make life a lot more enjoyable. I think Flylady has a saying “Making it fun will get the job done” or something like that. That can be easier said than done when you’re exhausted and frazzled and ready to collapse, but I think it’s worth the effort to try and enjoy where you are!
So there’s my two cents. Obviously I’m very far from having this figured out, but I think having a plan and trying to enjoy whatever season of life you’re in are two major components in succeeding with this traditional cooking lifestyle.
Stanley Fishman says
Kelly, I am in awe at everything you are able to do. That said, anyone who cook real food and makes their own broth, condiments, etc, has a challenge.
The best thing I have come up are these –
I plan as much of my tasks as possible in advance, and set aside a time for them. Somehow this always makes them go faster.
I try not to delay things when it is not necessary. The Royal Navy had a motto,
“The sooner the better”, and this attitude can really help in getting things done.
I do my best not to worry about how much I have to do, as this makes it much harder. It is better just to focus on what I am doing, and not worry about anything until it is time to deal with it. After all, I have a plan.
I try to find the fun in everything I do. Even peeling onions can be fun, with the right attitude.
The Nourishing Road says
Cleaning = Headache
Chocolate = Heaven
Well, I make the chocolate 85%, and reward myself with it AFTER I’ve at least attempted a little cleaning!
I’m sitting here writing this comment, when there a whole kitchen piled high with dishes, a washing machine beeping as if to say “I’m ready to be hung out”, and a floor which has almost forgotten what the hoover looks like.
I guess Prov 31 will always be an ‘ideal’, and rarely a reality.
Natasha 🙂
Laura says
Im a SAHM. I have two kids and I watch two others, so most days I have 4 kids between the ages of 1 & 3 in my house. I was having someone come in to do the deep cleaning every two weeks but our budget decided that we couldn’t afford it anymore. I’m busy.
If I were to try to be creative with my meals I would have no hope. Luckily my husband is on a pretty strict diet (4 hour body) so what we can eat is pretty limited. I have a weekly meal plan, that stays the same most weeks. On Saturday I print off the next week’s plan (easy, since I have a template set up on google docs) and make a shopping list for the next week. On Sunday I do the majority of my weekly shopping, which is usually just a few perishable things since I do a monthly shopping trip for pantry items and order several things online. I will also do all my prep for the week on Sunday, such as chopping all the veggies we will need for the week, bread baking, and I *try* to get the house clean so I can start the week off on the right foot.
On my weekly meal plan I have a to do list for each day, which includes everything that needs to be done to prep for 1-2 days in advance. I don’t write down why I have to thaw ground beef, or what day it’s for- that’s too much to think about. I simply pull out the ground beef because my to do list told me to, and when I need it two days later, there it is thawed and ready to use.
I make extra of each meal and pack up the leftovers to send with my husband to work the next day. I’m learning how to deal with lunches at home for me and the kids. Usually we just end up snacking throughout the day on fruit, cheese, yogurt, or snack bars if I manage to make them during nap time.
If it weren’t for my repeating weekly meal plan I don’t think I’d be able to pull it off. It’s very rewarding to be able to make everything from scratch and feed my family well. I look forward to the day when my kids are a bit older, and I am able to stop babysitting (and after my husband loses the weight) so I can spend more time trying new recipes and adding more variety into our diet. For now, though, I’m doing the best I can with the time I have. I often go to bed at night so tired and overwhelmed that I could cry if I stubbed my toe, but at least everyone is fed and clothed. I get by by reminding myself that this is just a temporary phase in life- that I won’t always be spread so thin.
——-
I shared my ideas for menu planning. But thanks for letting me spill my guts a little, too. 🙂
Anne says
Good luck to you!! You sound amazing.
France @ Beyond The Peel says
I have to say that not having a tv really helps. It’s amazing how much time can get sucked away watching the boob tube (that’s what my mother called it). Even if you watch one hour a night and a movie once a week, that equals a full work day (half of one for me but you get it).
Secondly a day a cooking is the most important thing. Knowing what we’ll eat for the week is crucial and making as much of it at once. Making big batches of beans and legumes, freezing the extra, stews and soups. I not only save myself an average of 4 hours a week doing batch cooking but another 2 hours a least by not having to do last minute grocery store runs.
And Kelly, like you said, learning to say no and adding a little buffer time helps huge. If I think a project might take and hour and give myself and hour and a half. Otherwise I’m always stressed out and feel like I’m behind.
Have a great week.
ValerieH says
When I saw your headline, I thought you were just referring to the food. Following an NT diet requires going a lot of extra miles. I think I have it easy. I have my favorite meat farmers visiting my town once a month. I belong to a dairy co-op that comes twice a month and also sells frozen meat, eggs and some extra produce. We have lots of good CSAs nearby for vegetables. I garden but I don’t preserve the harvest. If I plan ahead, I have what I need that is highest quality and sustainably raised. It is food that fits my values.
Fitting it into my budget is a challenge. We are a single-earner household and we have some credit card debt. According to Dave Ramsey, I should cut out EVERYTHING to pay off debt ASAP. Live like no one else so we can live like no one else. When I look at my 3 children, I can’t see putting their nutrition on hold for a year to pay off debt. We buy the cheapest cuts: ground meat, stew meat, roasts, and chicken parts like wings and drumsticks. So I could scale back on the meat and eat more beans, etc… except that low carb really works for me. I’m afraid if I do that, I’ll gain weight and I am very far from my ideal weight as it is. Though, more soup would help stretch it and the broth is healthy.
I work full-time. Many of my acquaintances marvel at all the things I’m involved in and wonder how I get it all done. Most of the time I feel like I’m not accomplishing anything. I just follow my bliss. It isn’t housework – LOL.
My husband is the stay-at-home parent. He does a lot, but not enough housework for my taste. That is a source of contention in our home. I found Flylady.net many years ago. Daily emails are free. They make their money by selling household items. It is a brilliant way to fit all the housework in. The gist is breaking down the work into manageable amounts, setting a timer, doing all you can in the time allotted and being able to let it go when the time is up. There’s a 30 day beginner plan (baby steps) to help you start habits (which I haven’t implemented 🙁 . ) The emailed articles always address our perfectionism and finding a way to peace with yourself. This is truly crazy thing to say because I have only created 1 habit out of reading emails for > 4 years, but I truly believe this is The Way. In every moment you are mindful of the one task in front of you. Every task gets you closer to the goal but you don’t have to hold the whole goal in front of you. You only have to work on this one small thing and the next step is planned out too. You create your own schedule and make time for rest, exercise, and computer time. Lots of people (not just women) have implemented these strategies successfully in their lives. The emails have testimonials from people with WAY more problems than I have. I’ll make this my 2012 goal to incorporate more flylady habits, starting with actually reading the email every day.
Anne says
Just started following the flylady too! For me, it sounds like using available time and being motivated! NT too is important. I am just thinking we always need to balance.
Musings of a Housewife says
awesome advice, pinned and stumbled.
I just do not do it all. I actually wrote about this today! I have made peace with it, for now. I have certain things I do, and certain things I just let slide, even though I wish I did more soaking and fermenting and things. maybe someday…
but part of it is cutting out other stuff. I do not do crafty things or play with the kids or clean my own house. I don’t nap during the day (I used to; I miss it!) and I also cut out some work commitments to allow more time in the kitchen. it’s a balancing act, for sure!
Amber J says
I feel like a big failure in many ways, but I have come to the recent conclusion that as long as my children are happy and well adjusted, decently well fed then really my complaints about cleaning the house and trying to “look” perfect are pretty much null. I don’t enjoy cleaning or doing dishes so they are the last things to get done, also I am a clutter collector, sometimes my house is a wreck because of it. I still have people over and they are fine with it. If family comes from far away I spend the week cleaning and trying to make it presentable, sometimes I wonder if they know… 🙂 I love it too when friends houses are messy, its such a mental relief to me and some of my best friends houses are messy at times messier than mine. Thanks for bringing up this topic, apparently I have a lot to say about it …
Soli @ I Believe in Butter says
Kelly, the first link doesn’t work.
For me it means a lot of planning and prepping of food in batches on the weekend. I also try to spend less time on the computer when I am home just so I can have more time to keep things together. My system isn’t perfect but now that I don’t have homework to consider I can have time elsewhere.
KitchenKop says
I’m not sure why there was a link there anyway, there wasn’t supposed to be, but I fixed it. Thanks for telling me Soli!
Kel
Cathy says
My husband and I finally decided to hire a cleaning service to do the heavy cleaning once a week (floors, bathrooms, dusting, etc). Best decision I ever made! It’s removed the guilt from doing other things when I “should be” cleaning the house and freed up my weekends, which is when that stuff usually got done. We’re both happier, doing more of what we LIKE to do, and less stressed out.
Nicole says
Thanks so much for sharing that Susie, something in me aches for that sought of life, so hard to obtain now in this world……I think the key is………simplicity
Jill says
The first word that popped into my head is: Crockpot. I use that thing a lot, especially for making bone broths (GAPS) or other soups/stews/casseroles. I don’t get everything done though, and often berate myself for it.
Colleen says
Me, too Jill! I’m actually thinking about buying a second crockpot as I always seem to have bone broth (which often sits in there for days due to lack of time) or soup slow cooking in mine and then I want to make beans or roast a chicken and I can’t. LOL!
Heather says
Thrift stores are a good place to get extra crockpots. Actually unintentionally, I have 3, in 3 different sizes, plus a big electric roaster pot, and a “little dipper” crockpot. On Thanksgiving this year, I had all but the little dipper going, and it often happens that 2 crockpots are in use. I might have dinner in one, yogurt in another, and a batch of stock in the roaster oven, like I did earlier this week.
Kathy (aka Mrs Dull) says
I have two big crockpots also that I bought on ebay. Can’t say enough about them! I bought them on ebay since I really wanted the corning liner in them and that is hard to find locally. Having two is a big timesaver for me.
Susie says
If you think about it, in the “old days” there was some simplicity to running a traditional household, especially in a farming household. There are work clothes, going to town clothes, and church clothes. Laundry done once a week. Baking once a week. NO DISTRACTIONS. No TV, no computer, no constant telephone ringing, no being “plugged in.”
I remember my paternal grandparents. They lived in an apartment (small). My grandmother worked as a bookkeeper for a small firm. My grandfather worked as a salesman for Ralston Purina. They were a team. My grandmother was a wonderful traditional cook. Every weekend, she made a vast amount of food: roast chicken (cut up into parts), large meat loaves, big batches of meatballs, and a huge pot of homemade soup, either chicken soup or beef cabbage/mushroom/barley. They ate from that all week accompanied by salads and cooked vegetables. Simple food but darned tasty good and lots of it. Grandma cooked, Papa cleaned, they froze the meals so weekdays were easy. They didn’t go out a lot. Their children (my dad and his brother) helped from an early age with the cleaning and errands. They would settle down in the evening after dinner clean up and watch a little TV together or read together or write letters (by hand!).
I think they lived a very simple and deeply satisfying life. I think the key for them was they didn’t expect a whole lot and were very content with how things were. A big outing would be to go to the park, sit on a bench, and feed the ducks.
They moved slowly, lived deliberately, and enjoyed every quiet moment of their lives. I think about them a lot.
For me, limiting computer time is key!
Susie
Cory says
Have you read Jerry Mander’s “In the Absence of the Sacred”? Fabulous. Sounds a lot like what you are writing about with your grandparents.
Nicole says
Hi Kelly, thanks for writing above this because it is one of my biggest struggles. As I have had health issues (getting a lot better) and we have a large family but with no relatives around to support us the one thing that really goes downhill here is the housework.
One thing that really helps me though is working on acceptance through meditation. What is, is. If I’ve handed my life over to God then I have to accept than I am only human and can only do so much. If my kids have love and some decent food then they are super-blessed. I also remind myself how ridiculous it really is that us westerners expect such perfection and cleanliness, it’s just NOT NATURAL. Our house can be pretty messy but we have a couple of friends whose houses are worse than ours and you know what? I love those friends even more because they are real, they are being themselves and they don’t care what people think. I know I breath a sigh of relief when I walk into a house that isn’t perfect.
Would be great to have more hours in a day but it aint gonna happen so I gotta work on acceptance and gratitude.
One thing we do after dinner is put on music and the whole family cleans up, no-one is allowed to stop until it all is finished, this makes a big difference to me and I hate it when we don’t do it. We all have fun singing and dancing too.
Would love to hear more about how you conduct your family cleaning parties Kelly, do tell.
Nicole
Australia
Adrienne @ Whole New Mom says
Totally agree w/ the loving having friends w/ less than perfect houses. I think we all hold up unreasonable standards.
Heather says
Kelly, keep an eye on things like Groupon and Living Social (these drop an email in your box with a daily deal). Sometimes, they have cleaning deals really cheap. Back in October, I used one of those deals to have a lady come clean for 2 hours–cost me less than $30!! And it was perfect timing. I had her come the day before I had company coming for a week from halfway across the country. Our new baby was born in August, and we had a ton of stuff that we had had in storage from moving finally catch up with us when he was 3 weeks old, and between the new baby & trying to stow all that stuff BEFORE my company came, ’cause it was all stacked in the extra bedroom, I NEEDED someone to work with me (yeah, I worked, too) for a couple hours at the last minute. That money was SOO well spent!
Ki says
Since I’m still (slowly!) healing my adrenals, I’d settle for just being able to get out of bed at a decent hour and get dressed! I’m only batting about half with that ONE goal! *sigh*
Adrienne @ Whole New Mom says
Hi. Adrenal issues here too. I’d love to correspond if you’d like. :-).
Susan says
Ki- This May will be 3 years since I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue. The first year I was put on total bed rest, with the only exception being to use the restroom. If I was alone, I crawled to it.
I am much better now, but NO where near my old self. I still get exhausted lifting the Brita water pitcher out of the frig! I have no muscles left and am still so weak. But at least I can finally get some laundry done and make my family a meal. I still, for the most part, am house-bound.
I would love to chat with either you or Adrienne! I truly believe some of my best healing has come from trying things that worked for other people. Hang in there, the healing is slow, but it does come. Don’t let it get you down!
Andrea Merrigan says
I would be interested in learning more about adrenal fatigue. I have had my hormones tested since we have struggling getting and staying pregnant. My naturopath has me on some things to help with my high level stress hormone, but she has never mentioned adrenal fatigue. I always feel tired and when working out I feel so weak (doing a boot camp right now). I should not be feeling as weak as I have been the past month or so when working out….not normal for me! Any input would be great:)
Susan says
Andrea- I went to your blog and got your email address. I’ll drop you a line! We can share war stories!! 🙂
Ki says
Andrea, I just sent you an email on your blog! 🙂 If anyone wants to correspond with me and trade “war stories” and things we find helpful, I’m always available. You can email me at coyotevick(at)gmail(dot)com
Meagan says
I healed my adrenal fatigue. YAY! It is possible. AND YOU CAN feel great after!! Encouragement for all you adrenal fatiguers 😉 My #1 was REDUCING stress.